31.5.12

dawn voyage

I still remember the look on your face,
been through the darkness at 1:58,
The words that you whispered for just us to kno. You told me you loved me so why did you go away?

I do recall now the smell of the rain. Fresh on the pavement, i ran off the plane.
That July 9th the beat of your heart,
It jumps through your shirt, I can still feel your arms ..

But now I'll go sit on the floor wearing your clothes
All that I know is I don't know
How to be something you miss

Never thought we'd have a last hug,
Never imagined we'd end like this,
Your name, forever the name on my lips ..

...

So I'll watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep. And I'll feel you forget me like I use to feel you breathe. And I'll keep up with our old friends just to ask them how you are. Hope it's nice where you are ..

And I hope the sun shines and it's a beautiful day. And something reminds you, you wish you had stayed. We can plan for a change in weather and time. I never planned on you changing your mind ..

So, I'll go, sit on the floor wearing your clothes,
All that I know is I don't know how to be something you miss
..



I never thought we'd ever last hug.
Never imagined we'd end like this.
Your name, forever the name on my lips.
Just like our last kiss, forever the name on my lips.
Forever the name on my lips, just like our last.






Awake at 3.41am by someone. Then back to sleep.. found myself get down on my knees. Cried. Begged. Regretted. And how miserable .. you blamed me for anything. Any thing. I'm still loving you. But now i'm trashed, and scattered. Oh.

29.5.12

"i wish nothing but the best for you"

Kau tahu?

Semalam aku sendiri. Dan itu adalah rasa paling 'sendiri' yang pernah aku rasakan seumur hidupku. Seperti sebuah kesunyian yang luar biasa. Sayangnya sunyi itu bukanlah sunyi atas ketenangan, tapi pasrah. Oleh semuanya yang kusadari telah hancur keping demi keping.

I thought we'd get to see forever, but forever's gone away ..
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday ..

I should've know it would be a song of mine.




Oh God, aku cuma nggak nyangka ternyata aku ini hina banget ya. Sampe-sampe aku jadi alasan buat kehancuran seseorang dengan seseorang yang lain. Aku se'murahan' itu ya sampai kamu bisa menjudge aku seperti itu? Aku cuma gak mengerti, kawan. Sungguh gak mengerti atas jalan pikiran kalian berdua. Sebenarnya jalan pikiranku atau jalan pikiran kalian yang murahan ya?

Just a reminder, aku kenal kamu. Luar dalam. Dua tahun terakhir yang kuperjuangkan hanya untuk bersamamu, mencoba mengerti kamu, saling membenarkan, membelamu, menyayangimu, seutuhnya. Dan yang kau lakukan? Kau lebih memihaknya. Dia yang mengenalmu karena kau cantik. Dia yang menyayangi segala kelebihanmu.Dia yang MEMBENCI kekuranganmu. Dia yang sok benar dan sok mengerti segala tentangmu. Baiklah, kurasa ini akhir dari segalanya. Kembalilah padaku jika suatu saat kau mau. Kembalilah dan sembuhkan sakit hatiku. Itupun jika kau mau, dan kau mampu.

I heard that you're settled down
That you found a boy and you're in relationship now
I heard that your dreams came true.
Guess he gave you things I didn't give to you.

Old friend, why are you so shy?

Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light.

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited

But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead, "


You know how the time flies

Only yesterday was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited

But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I'd hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead."
Yeah

Nothing compares

No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?


Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you
Don't forget me, I beg
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead."

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg

I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead."














God, i broke up with my best friend ..

25.5.12

and even on the evening

Coming to share some pictures we hunted on a resto and also in the middle of a field at the Anggrek road. It was accidental and pretty, though. Actually i wanna review the food but i seemed too starving to complained. :D




Softdrink 3.5k



yang diatas tak ternilai harganya, yang dibawah juga..


wajah wajah mesum ..
the next are tummyfilllers.


Special Fried Rice 9k



Original Steak 9,5k

.. and the following pictures seem predictable.. yes. Pretty unwanted. Pretty cute.


TRIO MACAN. eh bukan..




cud u guess? No? Okay i'm not popular. Hehe





OKAY THIS IS JUMPING SECTION. EVERYBODY STANDUUP PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR!


kurang tinggi wik! Aaargh menyesal menyesal menyesal =,=



unyu beud itu pose gue, Dila ngambilnya pas banget..







AND FINALLY, let me sing..

".. baru saja berakhir hujan di sore ini,
 menyisakan keajaiban kilauan indahnya pelangi..
tak pernah terlewatkan, dan tetap mengaguminya,
kesempatan seperti ini tak akan bisa dibeli..

bersamamu kuhabiskan waktu,
senang bisa mengenal dirimu
rasanya semua begitu sempurna
sayang untuk mengakhirinya ..

melawan keterbatasan walau sedikit kemungkinan,
takkan menyerah untuk hadapi,
hingga sedih tak mau datang lagi ..

Janganlah berganti.. Tetaplah seperti ini.."



Canon EOS 1100D
EF-S 18-55mm
Thanks to Dila and Dewi

24.5.12

101

HEY READERS! Welcome to my 101st  post! Haha, kinda amazing eh. I thought that i will never get even 100 before. I decided not to post any important thing on 100th cause i don't. Once again, don't like 100 thing.
Okay in this 101st post i will give you a review about food.Actually i got it for free cause i bought a combo packet cost by 81k that contains 3 chickens, 3 rice buns, 3 Pepsis, and we got a CD from Ungu titled by 'Timeless' and also free 2 meals. My mum choosed the chocolate sundae, and me the original burger. About the burger, i like the way it looks. Such a tease. Here he is..


Cute? I know.
Until now i still save the paper, KFC pepsi cups, and also the sundae's plastic glass. I will rarely go there for some days forward i think.
First, the patty-buns that's how i say baked finely. It seems like you eat them in freshly baked even they are cold already. I ate them when it went cold. The lettuces were so fresh even they are clamped by the buns and also the chicken. Then, the meat, my favorite part of it was, it was good, really good as KFC always does to their chickens. It went like 'crash' when bitten. I also liked the mayonnaise sauce, they taste like rather sweet but also palatable. And finally i gave them 8 from 10.
The pepsi are good as usual, too. And about the sundae, it was the second tastiest creamy-thing ever munched by my jaw after Chocolate smoothie from A&W. It only took cost by 5k, of course i will rather choose this than A&W who put their smoothie on 15k.
.. and the chicken thing, never mind. You both know how well they are in making their chickens the most delicious than all.


Go to this place if you want to try some,
KFC Sri Ratu Jl. Pahlawan Madiun.

(if you can't find them, then you're must be blind. How can't you see the big bucket?!)

"I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying, dead." Oscar Wilde
“Am I tough? Am I strong? Am I hard-core? Absolutely.
Did I whimper with pathetic delight when I sank my teeth into my hot fried-chicken sandwich? You betcha.”
  James Patterson

22.5.12

trying

yea this is ma first time using blogger droid. i hope i can enjoy it for a bunch of fun forward, hehe see ya!


oh ya. i will get the result of high school i want tomorrow, wish me luck guys! :)


Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

16.5.12

Future ola future

Boosh! Got ya.
How's life? I'm fine really hard. The moon is coming right now and just God knows what was that, hehe. Even had somewhat hurricane-venus these days. However we've puzzled the puzzle and fix 'em up already. Not quick. It was a-yearlike-4-days. Terrible, yes that. Ok, i'm a dumb but i'm liking to say much. "It's better to say too much than never to say what you need to say", eh? John Mayer told me. Blame him if somebody still holding that fcking "Silence is gold"-thing. As always, the next words will have no relations with sentences before this. You know me so well. Ah.. really.

May 3.
Starts from Rosalia Indah night bus agent. We got there with a lotsa hope packed on the suitcases. We were ready to rock. Yea i didn't know her feeling so let's better to say "I was gonna rock". It was a tiring 20 hours just to settled on the seat. It went better since i saw my mum beside me. She always succeed gaining my mood before. First we got the Super-executive bus class because our exact bus was in Solo. Whoa! Could you imagine that? We were feeling like in a jetplane!! Wide left to right and also back to forth recleaning-seats with 1-2 formation. Then i ask mum. "Do you think what i think mum? I'm hoping the time rotate against the clockwise. Much slower." Haha. Seriously guys, it was C that meets O, that also friend with Z who had just married Y. But the wonderfulness usually don't last forever. And it got us just to stay in the bus for 3 hours. Hah, then we met out bus at Solo. Executive-class. Not bad. And our night spended by sang around with John Lennon who danced and kissed a lot with Yoko Ono. "Dumbass conductor, we have a lot of underage brats here".

May 4.
Got there with live-surviving cab. Felt like sen no kaze ni natte blowed my face. No not wind, solar-smoke. We got blackened. And thats i want. "Got blackened of adventure" and i think i accomplished my mission.
We entered the resort named "Kinasih". First time i saw that, it seemed ratherlike a hotel than boarding school. And then the huge gate opened by the securities. Then ... feels like someone played a Busker Busker - Cherry Blossom in force. Soo.. green. Like a drama.



Oh god, this is the best school. Ever. I ever seen before. Am i will be here for sure? I was asking myself. And God knew i was fear, but ihad to do this one for everyone. Like i was got into a war with students allover Indonesia. Like i got to punch their face one-by-one but i was faceless. Then i remembered my brother said "Cemungudh kakak" then i felt filled up.

We were waiting at the dorm-will-be lobby for almost 4 hours to get the room key. I was a room with Claudia, Lidya and Lintang. So, there was 3-dia at room. Claudia, Lidya, and Maulidia. Haha fun, and it made us stay inside the room when everyone was lost in nowhere to get know some strangers, yes--sleeping. Sampe hampir magrib, without Lintang.

At nite, we all gathered in what they say Bale Bengong to had some dinnerbox and had fun with the seniors. Sang some songs and at last i got fascinated with a man from the city of nowhere. I was fallen in love with his voice. Then we went back to the dorm at 9. Then played some joke until 10. And finally slept.

I was kinda saying that It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday. Ah..


May 5.
6 am. Got our suitcases laid down outta the roomdoor. Got ready to move on. After we done some breakfast we had a photo session and registration, then made some lines to hear some speech from the principal. And someone in my line vomitted. How sweet that she spread her weapon to somebody in front of her. Yuck. Bad start today.

8am. Academic test, math and english. not less than 100 questions had to be done in less than 2 hours, plus we had to write a story in at least 200 words. Lucky that at least they didn't say it was single count. Okay done. Another luck, i did the test along with the tomcats in the windows. Haha

11am. I was the first group called to have some interview with seniors from SA. My heart was a kinda played around with a treadmill. But with the violin player beside me (he looked like a girl actually so i amused. hehe) i felt better. We chatted with some seniors, and the one i remember is Arnold. He's a kind man i think. My name called, my life staked  the following seconds then.

12pm. having FGD with cool guys. Felt like sen no kaze ni natte lagi deh. Haha

3 pm. I went bekasi with my aunties uncle, cousins and niece there picked us up. We got jagorawi highway, it was raining and i like it. My journey ended. Even i'm still afraid, at least Allah knows i've done my best.

May 6.
went Mega Bekasi and find this picture. I bought a jeans only. I was wealthless. haha


Had some brownies making with my aunty and my mum. And got this pic. I hope you see it, brother. :)



May 7.
It was so cloudy and raining in the morning in Bekasi. I was upstairs and feeling cold by myself. I miss you.. And i think i was gonna miss you.



I went Ponorogo. With a sack of hope that you will be my future. Yes, future. I've dreamed to be with you far away before.I'm still waiting for a reason to make me stay longer there. Longer to be part of yours. Longer than anyone ever thought about.

11.5.12

Morning Greet



Haha, want it? Just wash your creepy face by now! | mirror | "You better told that to yourself. You look creepy."

Okay theen. I'm going to sing a beautiful song for you. For me, actually. Hehe. Hope you're gonna like it! You, there, hear this.



It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday
B o y z  I I  M e n
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How do I say goodbye to what we had? 
The good times that made us laugh 
Outweigh the bad. 

I thought we'd get to see forever
But forever's gone away 
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday. 

I don't know where this road 
Is going to lead 
All I know is where we've been 
And what we've been through. 

If we get to see tomorrow 
I hope it's worth all the wait 
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday. 

And I'll take with me the memories 
To be my sunshine after the rain 
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday. 

And I'll take with me the memories 
To be my sunshine after the rain 
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday. 


BA-DUM-TSSSS!!

10.5.12

Ima time machine, anata ni ai ni iku.. koto ga dekitanara.


remember that ..

and,




...






and ..

yes, you.

Oggie is trying hard to catch Deedee, Joey, and Marky and i dont care. I AM ENVY. Of you, yes, YOU, THANK YOU. For inspiring me a lot. The next sentences have no relations with this.

this' gonna be a hard days too i think, i've been waited for so long for you and another you and also .. yes, you. I'm tired of everything i don't even understand of. I've done anything unknown just to make any sense of you and you. Ya, i'll make you happy i know that. And i decided to, 'not' surrending, by now.




If life really made of a story, then i'm gonna tell you this.

e  l  e  g  i

A. H. Maulidia
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tiadakah engkau berfikir walau sekali, jika aku lelah?
Tiadakah engkau melihat, walau sedetik, jika aku berpura-pura?
aku tahu kau tak bisa, tapi,
tiadakah kau berfikir untuk setidaknya mencoba?
Aku lelah. Aku berpura-pura. Aku mencoba. Dan aku jatuh.
Kemudian, kau tak bisa menyelamatkanku.
Karena kau tahu apa?
Yang kau berikan untukku hanyalah kata-kata.
Sesuatu yang tak bisa kupegang,
fana.



...
Biarkan aku pergi sekarang juga,
kau sudah tak punya hak lagi untuk menahanku. Tidak juga hujan.
Aku menyatu dengannya,
bagai tanah yang gembira karena tergenang ribuan tetes darinya.
Akulah ilalang, dan kau angin.
sering disebut sebagai mahluk lemah, tapi kuat.
Bahkan aku terus saja melepaskan berkas-berkasku untuk kau bawa kedalam hidupmu--yang tanpa tujuan.
Dan kau tahu, hanya merekalah yang pergi, aku harus merelakannya, dengan tidak pergi kemana-mana dan terus menumbuhkan mereka,
seakan menunggu angin maut--kau berhembus.

Sudahlah, tinggalkan aku sendiri.
Aku akan mencari angin yang lebih kuat.
Kau tahu aku akan jauh lebih tegar dengan itu.


Thanks. A lot.



I want to say goodbye.. By now.


2.5.12

ANTAHBERANTAH

This is the first of May 2012 when i exactly write this and i’m so glad to say that i’m fine. Kayaknya udah begitu lama aku nggak sharing, dan believe it or not kalian telah melewatkan banyak cerita sejak Februari. Oke i’ll tell ya!


Februari
Well let me tell you about my wishes:
1.       Kurus euy!
Yang akhirnya gagal dikarenakan stressing akibat ujian yang datang bertubi-tubi dan nggak kelar-kelar. Tubuh saya memerlukan banyak energi dan akhirnya hasrat makan mengalahkan otak yang selama ini berpikir keras. Okelah gak papa, minggu depan ada planning untuk belajar swim seminggu penuh bersama Nala dan Athik. Awalnya aku gak niat, tapi setelah aku tanya “Ngapain renang?” masing-masing kedua tangan mereka meliukkan sebuah bentuk yang indah, yang akhirnya menghipnotis saya untuk berkata “Aku melu!”.
Quote of the day: “Masalah ireng iso diatasi, nek masalah dhuwur ki urgent. Mergane selak entek umure gek gak modot-modot.”

2.     Being nicer.
I don’t know about this. Aku lost contact sama tement-temen terdekatku dan banyak banget masalah akhir-akhir ini.
3.       Got more trophy.
Yang ini berhasil. Ambisi saya sudah terlanjur meluap-luap. Pengen segera ke sana. Dari bidang eksak maupun enggak alhamdulillah aku bisa ngejalaninnya dengan semangat dan hasilnya juga memuaskan. Thanks God You’re my strength. 
4.       

Self-manage increasing
Ini juga lumayan berhasil. Nilai-nilai mulai menunjukkan perubahan yang signifikan dan berarti aku sudah cukup berhasil me-manage waktu belajar dan waktu main. Tapi sialnya harus kehilangan sebagian besar waktu main buat sekedar belajar. And i believe it will worth a lot sooner or later.

5.      Being a team with someone.
Done perfectly. We have moved on together.

Hemat
Kurang berhasil. Pengeluaran untuk bahan-bahan pengisi perut cukup menguras kocek dengan sangat dalam. Dan udah lama banget enggak dikasih uang saku sama Ayah. Hmm.. Nggak papa deh.

7.      Lighter? Nevermind.

8.     Done Class’ problems with miracle.
Failed at the first time. We got such a BIGGEST trouble in our history. And finally, we apologized each other. Problems solved.


March
Maret aku sama sekali gak sempet nulis diary. Bener-bener bulan yang suram.


April
The most exciting month this early year! Di awal bulan aku udah outing sama mom and dad ke madiun, shopped some kinda shoes for ourselves. Kebetulan disana lagi ada promo beli satu gratis satu, merek Yongki Komaladi! Dan yaa, cewek + diskon gede = pelampiasan pada kaum pria. Jadilah ayah saya nunggu diluar karena gak tahan. O iya, ketemu wedges bagus-bagus disana, tapi i decided not to buy any karena bentar lagi liburan dan pasti nanti barang baru lebih bagus dari yang sekarang. He he ;) Akhirnya aku beli moccasin!

Try out awal bulan ini bener-bener buruk banget. Worst TO i ever done! Dari semua mapel paling sedikit salah 7! Godverdomme. Dan at last aku melepas pilihan SA Malang dan memfokuskan diri ke SMAN 1 dan nungguin pengumuman SA Bogor. Baiklah, wish me luck guys!

April 4th. A great day with Ghozy Habibi. Waktu itu sore-sore, aku lagi nonton The Way Back di Fox Movie Premium, lagi gak smsan sama Monkey dan dihibur sama dia. First of all tiba-tiba kita ngobrolin masa depan dan .. kita berdua tahu kita gak sanggup ngadepin perpisahan. Selama ini mungkin kita udah dekat, terlalu dekat untuk sebuah hubungan beratas namakan ‘persahabatan’. Atau haruskah kita namakan ini ‘persaudaraan’, brother? Kita juga gak tahu. Yang aku inget Cuma, ini kesimpen di folderku..
“Janjio neng aku awak dewe ki gak bakal misahne awak dewe masio awak dewe gak iso face2face masio long distance awak dewe kudu tetep ngene iki.”
“Aku yo janji ng kowe. JANJI :)
“Aku nangis ndul sumpah. Hahaha”
Dan ya sudah. Yang aku tahu beberapa hari habis itu dia putus sama ceweknya.


April 17th. Afan, Entis dan Jibanz gelut di parkiran. Kinda don't want to talk bout 'em. Hari itu saya dapet film bagus judulnya Taare Zameen Par, baguuus banget sampe dinangis-nangisin aku! :’D Malemnya pergi ke bookfair dan ketemu Nylon, love at the first sight.

April 20th. Ma brother went home! Saat saat menyenangkan bersamanya pun dimulai. Tapi sayang dia harus meninggalkan rumah, bersama ceweknya, untuk apa sodara? Nonton Avenged Sevenfold. Sedangkan saya? Mau liat Suju aja GAK BOLEH. Dammit. Baiklah, istighfar gundul.. istighfar..

At the end of April, sebuah kabar datang dari negeri antah berantah. Seseorang menelpon ayahku saat beliau sedang bekerja, dan sebaiknya ini kabar baik karena seseorang telah mengganggu saat berharga seseorang yang lain. Beliau menutup teleponnya, kemudian menelepon ibuku. Kemudian ibuku pulang dengan airmata beterjunan di pipinya. Waktu itu aku baru pulang main dari rumahnya Nabela sama Elementary School pals ku dan sampai di rumah dengan hati senang tak alang kepalang. 

Kamis aku akan berangkat to the city of nowhere. Ke negeri antah berantah yang aku bahkan tak pernah sekalipun menginjaknya. Mencari segala sesuatu yang dapat dicari. Dan meraih segala sesuatu yang dapat diraih. Aku akan merelakan sebagian diriku di sini, dan kau. Demi negeri itu. Aku rela. Apalagi kakakku juga akan leaving on a jet plane, don’t know when he’ll be back again. Starts from August,  ma birthday. I’m gonna miss him SO MUCH. {}

Akhirnya aku tinggalkan SMA 1, walau aku bisa masuk kesana tanpa tes, tapi hatiku ada di negeri itu, dan aku harus berlari kesana mengambilnya atau aku akan mati tak berhati. Akan kusiapkan diriku sebaik mungkin untuk bisa jadi sesuatu yang kau harapkan selama ini. aku akan meyakinkanmu bahwa akulah yang kau tunggu, akulah bagian dari dirimu yang selama ini hilang. Akulah yang kau cari, aku yang penuhi. Aku mencintaimu sepenuh hati dan akan kuambil hati yang lama kau renggut dariku. Akan kuambil dan membiarkanmu mengambil sebagian dari hatiku untuk menjadi milikmu selamanya.

Nice to hear about you, Bogor :)

Dan at last, we all celebrate this with an outing to Madiun again! Haha. Naasa wanted some new cool shoes and he got his League one, and i bought a Nevada brand—looks like an original TOMS Shoes i really want. Yes it is fake but, it was worth it! :D

And these are some pictures i and Naasa took then. Sebagian agak blurry tapi masih oke untuk dipajang. Heha!








yang dibawah diambil di rumah..


 itu hadiah kaos. Mas dapet kaosnya, saya cuman setikernya ._.


 itu teman tidur saya, Gee :)